Three Brave Families- 16 brave kids

Getting the whole group to look at one camera was NOT something we accomplished on Saturday!

One of the most amazing God things in all the God things that have happened during our adoption journey is the fact that just a few hours away are two Holt Haiti families. Our dear friends the Lisle's, who we met 2 years in to the long process and our new friends the Lizers who are adoption pro's. Both families live in small town Iowa.

Through the summer we gathered with the Lisle's and their 4 children a couple times and the benefits were apparent for parents and kids alike. Mylee and Macy are 7 and 5, just above and below #3 in age. They were good friends in Haiti and their friendship and love show up fiercly as soon as they are reunited. Steve and Tonya are loving and down to earth parents and talking with them, sharing our experiences and advice always leaves me refreshed and reassured.

The Lizer family has 3 grown biological sons. They added 20 yr old Rica, then a 10 year daughter (long name I can't spell) from India. The adoption bug bit again and they added 16 yr old Rogette from Haiti. Shortly after came Jurane also from Haiti. These are the current ages, the kids were adopted much younger. Our family had seen Jurane on the Holt website and #1 was often found looking at her picture and talking about how we should adopt her. A sign of God's influence, I believe, is that after Jurane came home she told her parents that she was #3's cousin!

Jurane holding a smiling Bruiser and Rogette behind. The bond of the Holt Haiti children is clear.

Jurane was also responsible for taking care of Mr. Man for his travel time from Haiti to Miami.

Saturday, Oct 23rd found us traveling to Perry IA to meet up with these two great families. We spent a fun afternoon at the community center swimming and then headed to a Chinese Buffet. (super brave to try Chinese food in small town IA) It was so fun!

We met Jurane and the smile on #3's face was ear to ear!

Via and her cousin Jurane. Seeing her cousin was #3's favorite part of the day!

They hugged and kept hugging off and on through out the day. Mr. Man and Bruiser seemed to recognize her as well and spent a lot of time flirting and smiling with Jurane too.

All 5 of my brood behaved beautifully and seemed to get a lot out of the experience. The big girls were my navigators and carried a twin or helped get food or changed diapers or whatever was needed.

Jurane and Bruiser bonded in the pool, even when Bruiser was in Mama mode!

I was proud of them. The twins behaved, mostly. Even #3 went all day with no fits or melodrama.

I learned about the trials of adoption for teens, the way parents work together, that much of what I experience is normal and what to expect next. I learned that inspiration comes from the kids who trust these new adults to love them, the kids who accept new siblings into their home unconditionally and the parents who choose to travel the road that combines both kinds of inspiring kids. These combination families are strange units. There is real peace in being with another family who gets it, who looks like you and who knows the road you are on.

It was another amazing day that left me exhausted, yet peaceful. These visits bring out the kid in me because as soon as they are over I am left counting the time and wishing for another visit.

I am so blessed that these strong and beautiful families live so near us. Our lives our woven together through the wonderment of adoption. I am proud to share my journey with them.

The Terrible Two's - time to be BRAVE!

An impromptu horse back ride made the day really special!

I'M 2! That was the lesson for the talking two's on Sunday and by the end of the day, they had it!

I remember very clearly the birthday parties for Mary Beth and Anna as they turned two. Two is the last birthday Via had before we knew about her.

Two is the first birthday we celebrate with our twins. We haven't even known them for a year, and now they are two. I am told I must quit referring to them as the 'babies' and start calling them 'the twins.' This will be hard because I loves me some rocky rock time in the big chair snuggling two babies. Mr. Man loves it too!

Sunday began with both babies on my lap in the big chair. They each had juice and a cookie. I had coffee. We were watching the news. Perfect! From there the business of the day began. A pancake breakfast, church, grocery store, nap time.

Nettie was a bit suspect at the paper should could tear, but soon learned to love it and the present inside!

At 4:30p.m. when the naps were over, the partying began! We headed to the orchard to buy pumpkins. Bruiser chose her pumpkin using the drop and roll method. If it survived the test, it went in the car.

We headed to the farm for hiking. However, #3 announced that if #1 brought her horse in, she would ride it. Since she mostly approaches horses with abject FEAR we jumped on this chance.

So Tessa was brought in and the twins had their first ride. It was lovely. They were so excited that they chanted TESSA! the whole ride. The tears flowed and the cries turned desperate when it was #3's turn on the horse. She did great and within a few minutes she was an expert telling us how to lead the horse and what her next project on horse back would be.

A very short hike followed the horseback riding because it was getting dark.

Dinner was taco soup and corn bread and the new 2's wolfed it down!

Following a pleasant meal of bowl turning and table pounding there were presents!

While at first very hesitant the twins eventually really got in to tearing and laughing with each gift. They showed complete surprise and overwhelming enthusiasm for each gift. Even for each other's gifts!

New Tonka trucks from Nana and Papa were a huge hit, though Mr. Man wasn't sure about sharing!

Cake and candles followed. Mr. Man clapped and cheered through the singing while Bruiser seemed a bit overwhelmed at being the focus of the attention. The tore in to their pumpkin cake and ice cream and shared both cake and toys, though not always in ways I had hoped.

After more play time we settled back in to the chair for rocky rock, ending the day just as it began. The three big sisters were truly pleased at how the day unfolded and so was I. Parenting two year olds when I should be too old to parent two year olds isn't always easy. I have second guessed myself more than once in the passed 9 months.

It was Bruiser's Dr. kit but Mr. Man took over and showed her a new way to use the play shot. Hmmmm.

Some how all those second guesses go away and my heart is content whenever I am in the chair buried under snuggling, smiling, loving babies.

There was nothing terrible about this turning two celebration!

Outdoor Adventures and Time Travel

The 'Fish Tree' has been stuffed with sticks for generations!

It would be completely stupid not to get out and enjoy the amazing fall weather. Especially if you have three kids under the age of 6 in yourhouse. Outdoor fun = easy bed time, so it is a no brainer to get out and play.

I was privileged to grow up in an amazing place, surrounded by beauty, guided by a mom who sent us out into that beauty with very few rules. Seriously. We played in the woods for hours at a time. We threw sticks and dirt and 'specials' (a dirt clod with a rock tucked inside) at each other from across the path, hidden by forts made of large branches. We didn't travel with water or snacks which means we went hours without needing anything. Giant snacks and water from the hose or maybe koolaid was provided when we returned to the house.

My amazing Mom and the Mr. Man survey the path ahead and try to find the best route.

During the summers I have always tried to take my girls down to the farm as often as I can. They know how to get dirty, take on a huge messy project and see it through to the end and they know the trails too. Though not like my brothers and I.

On a recent amazing fall day the twins, children #2 and #3, my mom and Carl and I all headed in to the woods for a hike. Within 100 yards of the adventure I was transported back in time.

The twins raced off in to the meadow. I have raced many horses and read many books in this lovely place.

The sound of the leaves, the feel of the dirt path shifting underfoot as we tromped along, getting just a little winded by the climb of the first long, steep hill, it was all exactly as I remembered it. I didn't hide behind a tree and pelt the rest of the group with dirt clods. I resisted the temptation to show Bruiser how to make a 'special.' I had a camera and not a walking stick or other 'ammo' in hand. Yet it was still so much like all the hikes of my childhood.

Watching the children explore the woods and take in all the sensory experiences was such a joy. They were overwhelmed by the freedom and at first were hesitant. It didn't take long before the kids were charging ahead and examining every leaf, log and dirt pile. It was awesome.

We hiked a long way for hikers of short stature and the little ones were all troopers.

The adults took turns carrying tired kids, bringing up the rear and catching up with the front runners. It was an hour long adventure that warmed my heart. We saw a few deer, only those brave enough to hang around when such noise was approaching. But there were birds and squirrels and rabbits racing across the path. There were lots of downed trees to inspect and leaves to gather and throw in the air. We did it all.

Another beautiful week is upon us and I plan to hit those trails again soon. It is nothing short of spectacular at this time of year. With winter looming in the future I would be stupid not to take advantage of every nice minute given me.

And since I rarely travel alone these days, a hiking we ALL will go!

Watch my dear mom race Via through the meadow!

Becker's Brave Birthday Bash!

'We are all in the 'bers.' This is how Anna describes our family's procession of birthdays. Indeed we begin in SeptemBER with Anna and Mary Beth, continue to OctoBER for the twins, onward to NovemBER for Thomas and Via and saving the best ber for last, I am in December. Typically I celebrate with a party on the day of the birthday, letting that child choose the meal and cake. As I looked at the fall and the parade of gatherings I would host, I panicked. The cost, time, planning, etc of 5 birthday parties was too much. I proposed one big bash to the two eldest children. Afterall, they would be aware of the change, the little ones wouldn't know or care. My two lovely oldest girls instantly agreed and then we told the father what we were doing. He said why do we need to do anything? We bypassed him on all future arrangements.

October 9th was an open Saturday. This means there was no Husker game. So along with many, many brides, I planned my party for this conflict free date. Child #2, my little baker, made all the cakes. Giant cupcakes in butter pound and chocolate pound cake; all from scratch, made the night before and the morning of the big event.

Yep, Anna and her Nana strike again with desserts that rocked!

The gala was planned for post nap to pre dinner time. Snacks of all sorts, plus the giant cupcakes and icecream were the only food fare planned. Though at the last minute I made pigs in a blanket with crescent rolls. My brother pronounced me 'old school.' Then proceeded to eat 6 of them. In total the party members consumed 28 pigs and their blankets.

To prove how much she has grown up Nettie harmed no one while trying to bust the pinata.

Betting folks had her as the odds on favorite to bust it first!

There were bubbles, a pinata, side walk chalk and general running around. It was really a fun day and the birthday kids seemed to really enjoy it. They were all given some nice gifts and that was fun for them too. Child #3 was especially pleased with a party just for her.

Um, yea, that is a chicken suit, Mr. Man's gift from our fairy godmother, and yes, he loves it!

Her actually birthday isn't till November 30, the last one of the kids. This party helped make that wait seem more bearable. She and the twins have never had a party just for them. We will celebrate as a family on the actual birth dates. We have been celebrating Child #3's for 3 years. Typically we have a nice dinner, sing to her and decorate the Christmas tree. It will likely be a bit emotional to have her home for her birthday, finally.

Having gifts and cousins and a really, truly birthday party was all new and all loved by #3.

Birthdays can be stressful at best and disastrous at worse. It was important to me to celebrate our growing family. We have grown in number, in fact #2 asked me just today if we were gonna celebrate Gotcha Day. (I suppose, but wow, another thing to celebrate?) We have grown in patience. Albeit some more than others. And we all grow in years and size. OK, so I don't really want to grow in years or size, but o well. The point is, the kids grow up. Already I am seeing the babies become toddlers in earnest and no longer my babies. It is heartwarming and heartwrenching. #1 and #2 are becoming young women and leaving behind their 'girl hood.' #3 is no longer toddler like and is every bit a kindergartner.

Make A Wish! Cheese, Cheese and more cheese, but you are looking at my wish come true.

So the Becker Birthday Bash will be an annual thing. A way to mark our Brave march forward as we watch our family continue to grow physically and emotionally. Always surrounded by family and friends who love them. And that is the true gift of the day.

The good, the bad, the UGLY

Homecoming Week: Brings joy to kids and athletes and cheerleaders can't get enough of it. Teachers fear it. Some teachers join in, you know like, if you can't beat it, blah blah blah. I do a sort of half assed approach to the whole week, but I love that my students and family get involved. Homecoming week at BT is truly a full community and family affair.

It culminates on Friday with an outdoor cookout featuring grills manned by moms and their football player sons, grandparent's day program, and of course the football game. Anna's winning blue and gold celebration attire! She planned it herself!

Thursday night is the chili supper where all the seniors are introduced, court announced and senior football players teased. It is attended by families from Pre K- 12 and I love that. I can chat with and/or meet my Kindergartener's friend's parents, a former student who is now at college, current 7th graders and all varieties of BT parents and supporters.

My nephew Bash is #74 and he didn't eat through the jello very quickly!

The weather for homecoming this week was amazing! Great temps, blue skies and fall color all around. The bon fire Thursday night was picture perfect and the school spirit and community atmosphere was as heartwarming and as the fire was warm. Friday brought Blue and Gold Day, and Grandparent's Day: a first for Via. She had her first program, hosted her Nana and Papa in the classroom and treated them to lunch in her cafeteria. She thought this was amazing! She didn't sing or do many of the actions in the program. Bored or Nervous, hard to tell, but she definitely got in to having her Nana and Papa with her.

Via's moods make it unpredictable, but today she sure loved her Nana!

The game, while attended by hundreds and surrounded by a festival like environment, well, it was ugly. The band was great, the star spangled banner terrific and the court was just who I wanted. The game, ugh. But our poor guys gave it their all and will come back next week and beat Yutan.

The Becker clan socialized and cheered for more than two hours Friday afternoon. It was a lovely way to end a busy week. We headed home close to 7p.m. and thing 1 and 2 dropped to sleep shortly there after. Whew.

Mr. Man and his crush. They spent the whole game like this, no one, not even mama,

can get time with Mr. Man if his crush is present!

Saturday morning dawned bright and early. Really early considering Things 1 and 2 chose not to sleep, at all. By 11a.m. I was headed to the after hours clinic with two sick babies in tow. By 11:30a.m. I was sitting on 72nd street waiting for the police to arrive to write an accident report because I had rear ended a woman. While at a complete stop I turned to help Thing 1, the Mr Man, who sounded so pathetic that I had to turn and see him. My foot came off the break and that caused the car to bump the person in front of me.

Person in front of me refused to move to the nearby parking lot until the police came. When the police arrived the first thing they did was move us to the parking lot. That was when she claimed her neck hurt. ARGH!

Yep, this is the ugly of the weekend. And no, there wasn't any damage.

The day continued with the babies getting meds and starting on the path to recovery. Lots of mom time and snuggling seemed to be the theme of the day and that is just fine.

Sunday found us all feeling out of sorts, but healthier. The lovely weather and a good outing to the park helped clear our heads and prepare us for the week ahead.

So I am back at BT today doing a job I love in a special place surrounded by special people.

Whew.